Friday, April 28, 2006

Hi, my name is Rob and I have Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder

...now this is when you answer, in unison throughout the blogosphere, "Hi Rob!!"

In late 1979, out of nowhere, I began having a series of thoughts regarding numbers, images, and order. I would have to "work through" these in a certain order, correctly. If I messed up or did not think of the number or image in a "correct" fashion, I would have to start over again.

Other parts of this include having to move my head in a certain way while thinking of something, not able to stop until I get it "right".

In spring 1980, I'm playing golf in the backyard. I had a putt just a few feet from the hole on our "B" course. (I'll blog about my golfing days at age 13 another time). I putted, and made the shot. But I did not make it "correctly". So, I'd retrieve the ball, return to the place where I was and shoot again, but, before I'd putt, I would "whisper-shout" to myself, "This is the last time EVER!!!". Didn't matter. In fact, saying that particular sentence probably ended up as part of the "routine" that had to be done.

Other tics through the years?

---Some clothing I cannot touch or even want to see (plaid shirts, oxford shirts, blue jean shirts....) and, if I see it while I'm eating, eating comes to a complete stop.

---How many times can you make sure the front door is locked before leaving home? Enough to make sure you're not overwhelmed driving/riding down the road in a car/bus, etc.

---Driving down the road, you hit a bump. But you just know you hit someone. So, you find a place, turn around, and go back to check. Sometimes, the first time doesn't "confirm it enough", so you turn around and go back a 2nd time.

The first time I ever talked to anyone about this type of behavior was my incredible friend (and still to this day) Ginny, sitting in her front yard one afternoon after school our senior year. For some reason, I felt comfortable enough to explain some of the "rituals" I battled. No, she couldn't diagnose it, but, for the first time, someone knew my opponent, and that was a big plus.

Friends? Most of them were kind enough to ignore the behavior. Family? Not so good. Several family members from 1979 to 1989 thought my strange behavior was best answered by telling me to, "Stop it".

That's the rub----you can't stop it. Unless you have a gallon of serotonin I could inject.

Finally, in 1989 (thanks for praying for me, Mama!!), we found the information that helped us diagnose once and for all what I had been through the past ten years.

I had Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder.

By the way, big, big kudos to my wife, who, after we were married, stopped at nothing to figure out what the heck was wrong with the deficient guy she had just committed to.

For years (thanks Pentecostals), I suffered through time after time of battling the thought that I was filled with demons because of all this bizarre behavior.

No, not demon-filled. Serotonin-challenged.

Serotonin is the chemical in the brain which, when in plentiful supply, prevents these types of behavior, which are basically (for those of you who remember records, albums, record players....remember??) like when the needle on your record player got stuck in the middle of a record and kept playing the same snippet over and over.

That's what happens in some of the behavioral aspects of OCD.

I'll talk more about this as time goes on, but I am going to, from time to time, blog about OCD simply as a reminder that:

1) It exists....

2) I am one of approximately seven million Americans who deal with it (and probably many others who are suffering in silence for they haven't been diagnosed)

3) I have been, and will continue to be, very open and very public about my OCD, my struggles, my triumphs, and my hopes to help anyone else who is or might join this long and winding road I have now traveled some 26 1/2 years.

BIG thanks to Elizabeth McIngvale, the national spokesperson for the OC Foundation (just 19!!) for sharing her struggles, which are much more difficult than mine, on ABC's The View this morning.

Click here to read from Elizabeth and get the basics on OCD. If you think a friend or family member has similar type behavior and it's never been checked, do so. You won't believe how much peace you'll feel, even though the OCD storm continues, when you discover you are not the only freak in the world behaving like this.

No, you'd be joined by me and seven million of my closest friends.

Tuesday, April 25, 2006

Where do YOU watch "24"??

Go to http://24map.fox.com and show the world where you watch Chloe, et al in action!

Good evening, welcome to PistolWhip Airlines!!

Hi, I'm your Captain, Jack Bauer.

Please stay in your seats and keep seatbelts fastened until I FIND THE TAPE!!!!

I have to admit; I think 1am to 2am was the lamest hour of the year...I mean, day.

1) The whole world knew Audrey Raines would NOT pull a trigger. Not even on Trigger!

2) Ya really think Jack should have, realistically, been able to get to the plane like he did? (Points to Kim at work for this view!)

3) Logan "takes care of" his wife by having her "promise not to talk"?? That's not taking care of anything!

NOW----some good and other comments....

1) Chloe still shines. Calling Buchanan's laptop "pathetic" was a very deft move.

2) Kim noted this, too----my TV screen is really dark on the scenes outdoors in the middle of the night. I didn't know Curtis was the one who grabbed Audrey until he identified himself.

3) Pierce isn't dead.

4) Everyone I talked to today says Heller isn't dead. I personally don't see where he got the time to jump out, but, if he surfaces, it wouldn't be a surprise.

5) Good to see Mike coming back on the scene.

6) Pierce isn't dead.

7) Getting Henderson to CT...Homeland....ah, bad guy Motel 6, really will do more harm than good. He'll find a way to implicate Audrey in the whole thing, all the while she's trying to find half her blood.

8) Pierce will resurface at the most opportune time for the good guys, and at the worst time possible for wimpy, wimpy Logan.

FINALLY-----

.....PistolWhip Airlines Flight 14 is headed for..........

.....China?

Preliminary diagnosis continues....

.....which is why I'm not currently following up on my post of April 19th.

I have confided with a few friends, asking for prayer, but only a few. In the meantime, the study continues and the beat goes on.

And I still hate it as much as I hate cancer.

Thursday, April 20, 2006

Is there a way to sleep while awake?

Just wondering.....

....if not, I'd like to create a way. Then I could patent it, make some money, get the kids through college.....

....and try to complete my 80s CD collection. :)

I'm cycling really fast; the events of the past two days no doubt the reason. One hour I'm laughing up a storm, the next hour here comes the tears. Hopefully this will slow down as I get used to some new reality.

The Pretenders' "Message of Love" brings shouts of glee...and shortly thereafter "Right Here Waiting" from Richard Marx reduces me to mush.

I wonder what I would have done had I been faced with "Key Largo" by Bertie Higgins? Hopefully, I would find the nearest exit. :)

Wednesday, April 19, 2006

It's not official, but I feel it is.....

This is a post I never wanted to make.

I've prayed this would not happen, I've hoped and wished this would not happen, but, driving down the road at lunchtime today, I realized.....

....I think it's here.

I've dealt with it 26 years, and in minor ways even before that, and I wouldn't pray this crap on my worst enemy.

....but I think it's here.

But if that is God's will, we will turn this into an opportunity to help others as well as those who dwell in the Witham Nation.

I won't give any details, except to say it is a medical situation. When I feel it's time to talk about it and when I start making plans to face it head-on for the seven million Americans who are like me, the news, the emotion, and the HOPE will arrive.

This isn't a "terminal" situation, either, by the way, lest someone accuse me of "overblowing" something. I'm not, but if you thought that way, you don't understand. I must blog tonight. I must type. It's therapeutic. But yet, that which I want to scream out from the top of the highest mountain cannot yet be typed, much less screamed.

So I apologize for being cryptic (like I am in most of my posts....), but I needed a place and a few moments to vent.

I hate cancer. I hate this just as much.

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P.S.---In an ironic twist of fate, at same lunch time, shortly before bursting into tears driving back to work, I stopped at, of ALL places, 7-Eleven. Got a Cherry Slurpee. It rocked. And, hey! It was convenient.

Tuesday, April 18, 2006

I don't believe this......but yet I do.

This is the United Nations we're talking about.

Thanks to eyeontheUN.org for this piece of crap.

Love, the truth, and convenience...

So, tell me, why do I have philosophical thoughts and quirky notions just out of nowhere?

As I'm walking out of work tonight......the following:

1) Love is wonderful, and sometimes is inconvenient.
2) The truth is great, and sometimes it's inconvenient.
3) When either love or the truth is inconvenient to you....pray. That's alot better advice than simply "deal with it". That's no help, that's a blow off statement!

So, this all led me to this:

FIRST---THE FOLLOWING IS WAXING POETIC--IT IS NEITHER AN ENDORSEMENT OR INDICTMENT OF ANY AND ALL BUSINESSES TO BE MENTIONED--IT'S PHILOSOPHY HERE, FOLKS, I'M NOT THE FOOD OR BUSINESS CRITIC.....OKAY? GOOD, LET'S GO.....
1) Does this mean convenience store owners sometimes lie simply because of who they are?
2) Can they know for sure which loves in their life are convenient, and which ones can't come in for a deli sandwich?

For example:

1) 7-Eleven....the name is seriously outdated. When's the last time you stopped at 6am at 7-Eleven and they refused to let you in; only gently pointing to their outside sign as a reminder of their hours.

2) See, the name itself is lying. Can't blame the local manager, or the college kid working third shift. (Heck, there shouldn't be a third shift....)

3) Wawa....now, I like Wawa. I love their cole slaw, and they have Icees, which is the bomb. But, I must ask myself, is the love I carry for their cole slaw convenient or inconvenient? If I'm 2 miles away from a Wawa, the cole slaw is very convenient. If I'm in Nigeria, sounds like the other option to me.

So, does this mean love is only convenient when you are close to the one/the thing you love? Nah, can't be true. Ask any military family; they'll prove it wrong.

4) Sheetz....first, I'm scared of a store that just adds "Sh" to the beginning of alot of what they sell. Am I buying a "Club" or a "Shclub"? What's next, Doritos or Shoritos? Anyway, I'm off course....can you buy your morning coffee from a place named after what you just rolled out of?? Do they have "rumpled roasted"? Many people cannot deal with ever eating in bed (the wife). Meanwhile, I have no problem with it (bring on the cookies!!).

So, does this mean those who eat in bed find Sheetz to be truthful, therefore more relevant and convenient? Does this mean those who would never eat in bed find Sheetz on the verge of being disgusting, being that they "imprint" that name that reminds you of said bed, and therefore, inconvenient is an excuse you give to your buddies as to why you don't join them for coffee there?

5) FasMart....it's a local/regional chain. The name denotes, obviously, Fast.

---They want to serve you as fast and as convenient as possible?
---They want to serve you as fast as possible to get to the next guy? This would be labeled "inconvenient".

Love "fast"? Fast cars? Fast women? NASCAR? Would you subliminally choose a name like "FasMart" then as where to shop? Is this, then, love? If you drive past a Wawa to get to a FasMart, inconvenience of love is not changing your decision.

And the store itself? Is it Fast? Is this truth? Is it a convenient truth as they have excellent management and well-trained associates? Or is it inconvenient? Now, this inconvenient can be a great for them. For example, if they are short-staffed due to having to let go deadbeat employees, and the rest band together to get the job done no matter what, then inconvenience hath bourn more community and trust.

See? Love is sometimes inconvenient. Truth is sometimes inconvenient. Pray, like I said earlier----and, Praise God for both. Sometimes, inconvenience stretches you and molds you into someone you can't be.....if you live next door to your favorite convenience store.

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Great day at work today. I really enjoyed it.

GOOD LORD!! When's the last time I typed that here? :)

Monday, April 17, 2006

Live "24" from midnight to 1am....and more stuff, too!!!

I'm back!! I'm blogging!!! And it's time for "24"!!

It's the dark of midnight in Los Angeles as we rejoin the dark heart of President Logan.

I'm telling you, neither Logan nor Henderson is the top of the food chain. Wait, just wait.

Jack in a police car....that'll be interesting!

First TV shot tonight is a "CNN" ripoff, showing no partiality on the Fox network.

First cell phone call goes to: President Charles "Napoleon" Logan

First time I see a possible split between Logan and Henderson----12:03am.

Does this idiot actually think he can "use" Chloe???

Buchanan's back!!! Can't trust him now, either. Is Palmer safe with him??

Someone's at the pay phone, she's Audrey! (insert la la music here)

DADDY'S HOME!!! 12:06am

Jack----just tell him, for heaven's sake!!!!! Why does he have to show him something? Okay....listen to something.

Well.....in the end, the Jack/Daddy reunion was, ah, more like a punch to the stomach or something....

So, does this mean (if you remember, Daddy confronted the President in last week's promo) the "confrontation" is a set-up or maybe a way to honestly try to "shuffle Logan off to Buffalo"....where he could be readied for a re-enactment of President McKinley's assassination??
Chloe...hang up. There is no peace in this valley.

Man. Edgar, dead. Audrey, held. Jack, same. Buchanan, on waivers, a free agent. Doughboy, for all his warts, gone. Tony, dead. Michelle, dead.

Oh, Mike's cell phone has Fox News. We're tied at one.

Mike just knows, man, he's got a great gut. He goes to the Veep first to scratch n' sniff. Mike's gut 1, Veep 0.

Bingo. What order, said the General?

Mike now feels out the snake, and how best to cut the head off.

FINALLY----------THE CHINESE ARE FINALLY MENTIONED IN HOUR 19!!!!! And they are a pawn in Logan's "arsenal". They will be heard from again!!!

I think Logan is beginning to understand you can only hold onto sensitive, covert, patriotic, diabolical plans for so long before they start to fall apart.

You know, kinda like the Orioles. By the end of April, the falling apart should be well underway.

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Off the screen: Today was a good day. My awesome friend returns from vacation tomorrow. And, heard from another great friend today via email!

I'm still head over heels for Jill, aka #12, on Deal or No Deal. She looks so sweet, plus you can tell you could sit down with her for conversation, and it be so enjoyable and educational and intellgent, the next thing you'd know, it would be eight hours later.

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So, at what point will Miles have to grovel to get Chloe's help? Hey, thanks for the card, Miles! You can't beat Chloe, she's our MVP!!

Alright, slap this brunette Barbie and let her go back to Miles to be sexually harassed some more. Chloe tells her she's sick and needs help.

So do these two. (Logan and wife)....good heavens, would ANY of you ladies out there actually want to kiss President Logan????

Leave a comment at the end of this post if you would.

Our next call is Logan to Henderson. Logan, oh, I'm sorry, Mr. President Benedict, welcome to the program; what's your question for evil bedfellow?

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Off the radar: Wonder how many "24" fans are going to bolt out their front door at 10pm Eastern to get to the post office in their town that's open until 1159pm?

Even more frantically---how would like to be STILL DOING YOUR TAXES while trying to watch "24"? A great reason not to procrastinate next year, as tax day will be Monday again (Monday April 16, 2007).

I'm so glad they've upgraded the push-up bra at Victoria's Secret...mine is worn out. And, it's extra sexy. Wouldn't you rather have one that's "extra dog ugly?"

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This is not going to be the showdown we thought it would be last week during the promo. I'll keep an open mind.

Oh, no----not the seducer!! Pierce, don't do it!!!! You'll be the latest in a long line of losers that started with Hillary.

Cracking. Cracking. CRACKED!!!!! Good job, Heller---he remembered what I forgot; Logan's a hothead. It didn't take much to open him up. (Sounds like Jim Ross: "oh, he's busted open!!!)

I still don't trust Buchanan; now he's got Palmer and Chloe.

Back to Hillary.....ah, where'd Pierce go? No one to use her charms on. But where is Pierce????

Hasn't been a "Jack-filled" episode; I like those this year. Allow better storytelling with more character development for others.

Jack and Audrey yell "hot water, hot water!!!"---and she's not even having a baby!!

It's 12:48am.

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Off the show; during the break: A scare last Friday afternoon after receiving a call from Aunt Sherry at work that she and the five kids had been rear-ended on US 1. I run out the door, hit every red light ever built, and finally got there. Rachel was shaken up; Robbie's defense mechanism was to talk continually. One cousin complained of neck pain, but she's doing well. :)

I'M SORRY----RIDE IT LIKE A FORD??? Save a horse, ride a cowboy, now we ride Fords.
Good Lord, how 'bout just riding someone who REALLY, like, LOVES you. For example, how about a husband?

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Okay, last segment always brings out a bang. Where are we going?

Jack's first command to bad guy: 45 decibels.
Jack's first command to bad guy for the second time: 85 decibels.

Oh, I didn't mean "bang" literally!! Oh, and a "pow" for good measure.

Now...it's been a few hours since it was Bauer vs. Henderson.

Now we know why Jack's so good. His teacher keeps one upping him.

Now, it's Heller vs Logan vs. Veep, inside a steel cage!

Don't worry kids...it's just 1am, plenty of time for Audrey to heal up, Heller to go psycho, Chloe to do her thing, and I'm still waiting for Jack to tell someone as he shoots them, "I'll see you in hell". After all, that was in the original promo prior to January!!

So, am I ticked at tonight's events? Sure! But it's like wrestling; the bad guy has to get his friends and they team up to beat up your favorite wrestler so it's even sweeter when your wrestler gets his revenge (usually on pay-per-view if you're willing to cough up 35 bucks).

PROMO TIME:---More Martha madness; Audrey won't pull the trigger, and it's harder to see all the action when it's 1am in real time.

Whew. Time for snack, meds, and bed, in that order. Good night, everybody!!!

Friday, April 14, 2006

Open the Case!!!!

Love Deal or No Deal.

Period.

NOW------------I will be back for much discussion. Sometime. Honest.

Pay your taxes!

Monday, April 10, 2006

So, tell me, what is my excuse?

Hee hee.....

...the family returns tomorrow, and I'm glad. I'm ready to see them and the cats are REALLY ready.

Cody and I enjoyed this week's "24". Couple of quick notes....

...glad to see Secretary of State Heller. Now, did Logan plan for this, i.e.---does he have a plan to apprehend/kill him?

...glad to see Buchanan will be back next week. Hope he really didn't think Audrey would out him.

...Now who's the tub of goo? It's not the Prez; maybe it's the First Lady! Or, by wondering about that phone call....maybe not.

...tell the banker on "Deal or No Deal" not to accept a role as a banker on "24" for any reason. Currently, he's despised. Make the change, and he's dead.

More later----sleep awaits!!!

:)

Wednesday, April 05, 2006

I'll have no excuse this weekend.....

....the family is going on vacation, while me and the security system live here at Witham Nation Headquarters this weekend.

So far, I've scheduled watching "The Notebook", spending Sunday at work (whoopee!), and making sure I'm home Monday night in time to see "24".

Otherwise, it could be blog, blog, blog.

Surf, surf, surf.

But you know me.

Sleep, sleep, sleep??

I wonder if I can link an email to this weak novel. I did predict the President being the "evil" one over the Veep two weeks ago. Honest!!

I'll prove it!! OH, I mean on "24", not in real life.

Oh, and finally----want the most innovative, cutting-edge stuffed animal for your kids??? The Richmond Riverdogs hockey team is here to help!! Here's how!!