....got to enjoy lunch with two great friends from my former church pastorate today. My first-ever trip to O'Charley's, and I was very impressed. In this current "life-stage", where some days are filled with three pets, job-hunting web sites, and eventual human interaction as the day turns to night, it was VERY WELCOME company. :) :)
....at least there are some positives to this period between jobs. It's giving me a chance to do some catching up with friends, which eases the hurt of so abruptly losing daily contact with my work friends.
My psychiatrist used the best term I've heard since the events of November 5. He has seen some emotional improvement in my mental health and outlook, reminding me that the pain I readily showed at our meeting two weeks ago was "raw". He hit the nail on the head.
Raw. In fact, some of the most "raw" pain I've ever felt. It's one thing when you know something is just around the corner, or going to happen at some point, and yes, there were times from August on that I thought my job was so precarious I had my "future endeavors packing box" underneath my cubicle, partially packed. Honest!
Still didn't change the emotional impact. Days are better, the tears are less and the wounds are working toward the healing process. I think I'm past "raw", but continue to be mired in the first stage of "permanent reality", i.e.---this isn't going to change; that chapter is done.
With the job? No problem. The people? Another story. I'm leaning on God big time to help me through and begging Him that I not lose touch with special friends.
It's been wonderful to be with the kids more! We've probably spent more hours together in November than in the months of July through October COMBINED. You think I'm kidding. I'm not.
And on that note; I have to take one of them to school in just a few hours, so I'd better run. These thoughts came through my mind at, of all places, the eye doctor on Tuesday morning. It was so cool; they had a Bible in the waiting room, and it was opened to Proverbs 25. So I grabbed it and read more than that chapter and was challenged, blessed, chided, and brought closer to God. And something along the lines of the following went through me....
--CHERISH the moments of your past that you shared with special people in your life.
--PRAISE God for those moments and the wonderful memories you hold of those special people during this, an uncertain present.
--TRUST God for Him to introduce you to more special people, while keeping you bonded with those mentioned above, making for a grace-filled future. It also makes for a bus "fuller of friends" than there was before.
Just sitting here; I realized something. I haven't loved enough people yet. I just don't know where the next bunch of people are currently located. :)
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